Re-Wilding... me? - When the Wild Strikes Back

Two days ago I woke up with a scratchy throat (post-nasal drip is the best!). Yesterday it had turn into a full blown allergy attack - itchy eyes, random sneezing, an overall feeling of haze. And so, here I sit, on a Saturday, when I'm meant to be learning more about my connections to nature at a workshop, feeling the full effects of asthma complicated allergies and wondering when I'll get some actual sleep.

I have been fighting these allergies most of my adult life. I am an avid gardener, I enjoy hiking and camping, and nothing makes me stop and wonder like looking at the moon and stars, and yet, I am fully convinced that my state is trying to kill me. As someone who suffers from Seasonal Affect Disorder, I need daily sunlight to keep things balanced, but stepping outside sometimes results in an onslaught of sneezing and scratching, and, sometimes, an inability to breathe.

I woke up this morning determined to have a good day, even if I was home bound for the day. I took some meds, used some saline spray, and headed to the gym. By the time I was done with the gym, however, the allergies were in full force. Now, after a hot bath with a homemade oil mix that I made specifically to help with this, things are somewhat under control. Eyes aren't watering anymore, sneezing is under control, and I can breathe a little.

I am struggling though, through this particular incident, to remind myself why I am finding this path. Feeling ill like this makes me want to close the curtains, get under the covers, and just not come out. I want to eat comfort foods so that I don't feel so icky.

And yet, this journey is still important. That's what I keep reminding myself. Even if I do stumble, the journey is still so important. Yes, I missed something that was really important to me today - I will get the information later. Yes, I may eat poorly today - that doesn't mean I have to eat poorly forever. Yes, I may end up napping my afternoon away - that doesn't mean I won't win the ultimate battle against the weeds.

This horrible day isn't the end of the adventure.